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We held hands all night. We got together 2-3 times, always with other people around. I felt he had changed his mind about the date (a month ago, at a community event he asked me to go to a movie with him, then said Jeff asked him to go surfing, so I just went along). Do you want to come with us or meet you after? He said 'would you rather do something with your friends?' I said, w/o getting upset that I had reserved the evening for him and that we could meet after we see our friends. After the trip he wrote a nice email thanking me. We're from the same country, I met him at an event of our community at his University. I was very excited-our first official date! Please help: how can I make myself NOT CARE whether a man (or friend) changes his plans or doesn't act like I expect him to? We were intimate w/o intercourse, next day he said he can't spent the energy planning things and waste time from his work to make plans! Next day he called to ask me out for a movie or a drink Friday. WHY DID I OVERANALYZE this slight change of plans? When we met, I was at a restaurant w/ friends, he was kind of upset that I lingered for a minute before deciding whether to stay and have dinner first or leave w/ him. I met X in March. He tried to have sex with me, I said I wanted to get to know him better.We spent 3 days holding hands and being intimate w/o intercourse. Hello! On Friday, he leaves a msg: My friend Jeff with also be in your town tonight,so I'm thinking of seeing you afterwards. He told me "I'll disappear for a while now, I'm too busy w/ school until I start work again (mid June). I asked whether he'd rather spent Friday with Jeff, I could hang out with my friends. I had to talk to my friends to calm down, I thought this was a bad sign. I said that was fine, I'm sure you don't see your friends often. Thanks! We went on a hiking trip 10 days ago, we shared a tent. I was puzzled. I am upset w/ myself that made a fuss (even a little bit of fuss) about the date. He was distant, kept saying he wasn't trying to break a date. He was surprised I sounded confused. When I called him he sounded evasive and said: should we do something tonight? He's grad student 45 min away from my city.